You know, just how hard it was to accept, when like almost a month after that you said that it wont happen. You know just how hard I have fall in that hope which you have make me to believe? And I have to just let it pass, unwillingly.

And did you know how it made me sick thinking you are about to go on tour with your friends? Did you know how much my heart aches when I need to act like I'm ok with it?

No you never know. You never know because you always thought it was okay. When it is not! It never will be okay. Does having this feeling makes me a little less matured than how I should? Would standing still like statues would then proved my maturity? 

Am I not worth to be treated at least like a living human? Is my feelings is less worthy? 

Just please never force me to believe in any of your words anymore. I beg